Dear John

Review by Loc

There’s a Hollywood stereotype involving military assignments and loved ones left behind. If you’re the military guy, you might as well start looking for your next wife, because the one you have at home will be leaving you. And it won’t happen in person, you’ll find out via hand-written letter. It doesn’t matter that we now have email and satellite phones, you’re gonna suffer in agony because the most expected outcome is the one you refuse to consider, and your supposed loved one will use the slowest form of communication possible to make it worse. Thanks for your service, but your girlfriend is busy with some guy at home. Quick hit: if you consider those spoilers, too bad.

Dear John is the film adaptation of another Nicholas Sparks star-crossed lover novels. Granted, Hollywood hit a home run with The Notebook, tugging on all the right heartstrings to make you weep and clutch your chest in an emotional, cathartic release. But did you know, Message in a Bottle and A Walk To Remember were also based on his works? Yeah, not quite as resonant as The Notebook, but Hollywood does not succumb to mild success, and with The Notebook’s wide appeal, they went nuts on the adaptation. Since then we’ve had Nights in Rodanthe, Dear John, most recently The Last Song, and coming up True Believer and The Lucky One. But really, aren’t we the lucky ones to get the same movie over and over?

Yes, if there’s one thing you can count on, it’s a consistent story structure. Set in North Carolina or similar picturesque Southern state, Girl and Boy, or Man and Woman, meet under mundane circumstances. Through a series of mundane interactions, girl and boy grow extremely attracted to one another, some might even say “love at first sight” ensues. Then, circumstances force the couple apart, seemingly temporarily. Until, the hammer drops, and some seemingly unrelated event drives a permanent wedge between the once happy couple. Over time, boy or girl is shown adjusting to the loss, depending on the who the main character might be. Then, once fully accepted, another random occurrence forces the couple to confront each other. And with that, the door is reopened to future romance. Wipe away tears of joy, breathe in sighs of relief, and hug yourself all over.

So, back to the movie, Dear John. In this version, Channing Tatum is the boy/man, an Army man who falls for Amanda Seyfried’s Savannah. For the mundane meeting, Tatum is home on leave and retrieves Seyfried’s purse from the water, who happens to be home on Spring Break from college. For the mundane interactions, we see them partake in a two-week courtship. For the forced apart, John returns to service, and the couple promises to stay together after experience such sweet first love. Hammer dropping is the actual “dear john” letter that Tatum receives after extending his stay in the military. Adjustment comes in the form of Tatum making a career in the military and never venturing home. Random meeting happens years later due to familial matters that Tatum must attend. And the eventual open door for romance, will maybe it doesn’t happen this time. After all, there’s a lot of stuff going on to complicate matters: marriages, kids from previous marriages, Asperger’s Syndrome. Hello, if you’re throwing in Aspergers, that’s a wall that can’t be climbed, can’t! Unless you’re Rain Man. I guess it can be overcome, but I’m not saying it will be in this flick.

Overall, this is the same Nicholas Sparks plot that you would come to expect. For this flick, the courtship and “falling in love” portion seems awfully rushed. Granted, they only have two weeks to make the life-long connection, but the courtship seems superficial and relatively unconvincing. Everything after that is just roadblocks to their love, and it plays out pretty boring. Out of 7 years of military service, Dear John is in there for 3.

Rated: 4/10